Thursday, June 30, 2011

Thoughts from Marci:

“I went through my address book and picked out the people I wanted to send postcards to. Then I realized I was going to be far short on my 30 people so I started going through the address book again. I could feel my heart harden at the thought of sending certain people postcards. Isn't that ridiculous? I have these people in my address book (the real one not computer/online). Here is the proof that they have been special to me at one point in my adult life and yet, why was I being so stingy with my love? I still don't have the answers for some people but for some others, I realized that I was holding onto some hurt feelings. I wrote the postcards even though I didn't want to and I had second thoughts about what I wrote on several of the postcards. The postcards were on the counter, stamped and ready to go. And still, I hesitated, but I didn't change any of the postcards. And then, my husband took them to the post office while I was out with the kids. So, my love or mostly good thoughts are on their way out into the world. And I wait and wonder what their effect will be on those who receive them.

30 is a hard number..... I think this is a great challenge because it forced me out of my comfort zone and into some emotionally dangerous territory. I feel good about not playing it safe and am excited to send out my last batch next week. Thank you for letting take part in this awesome experience!”

I think what Marci talks about here is true courage and true letting go. I know this took her a lot to let these feelings go and write these a few of these postcards.  For her to experience that and know that she was holding on to hurt feelings and doing the postcards anyway is huge - is something I want everyone to experience with Project Sending Love.  Too many of us hold on to hurt feelings but if we step away from that one incident that caused the hurt feelings and look at the person with love and understanding and write those feeling to them - this is the true essence of this project.

Love,
Renee

Tuesday, June 21, 2011

“Love is one of the hardest words to say and one of the easiest to hear”

I have boxes and boxes of cards that have been sent/given to me over the years – birthday, thank-you, just because, cancer, etc. As much as I love to receive these cards and read the heartfelt message written inside, I love even more going back years later and rereading them.  They always take me to a special place in my heart full of memories and love – it usually ends with me sitting and reading the whole box of cards and crying at some point through the box…I can’t help it.

I know it is hard to tell someone that you love them, that they are special, that they are a precious gift from God, that they make the world a better place out of the blue – I know it is hard to take that leap of faith and listen to your heart and just do it – honestly, I know. I feel sometimes when I send out cards that people are going to think I am officially crazy and chemo has gotten the best of me – especially when I don’t talk to them on a regular basis – I know it is hard.  But I try to go back to that place in my heart and remember how much I love hearing/reading these words and know in my heart that the people I am sending my cards to will love it just as much as me. 
If we could all just remember how much we love to hear/read special words told/written to us and how even if we received a postcard out of the blue from an unexpected someone that we wouldn’t think this person was odd for sending it, we would say a thank you in our hearts.

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

Love, sweet love...

Week 2 thoughts from Sara:

“The experience has been a great one from my end, I’ve enjoyed confronting the challenges of sending my love. I feel like I’ve already learned a lot about letting go of my hesitancies and gotten through some of my fears of so openly expressing my emotions. I’ve never considered myself shy or one to withhold my feelings, but this experience has really opened my eyes to how much I really do keep inside; it’s really surprised me!

Another surprise is that I’ve only heard from one person that I’ve sent to – it actually has me wondering if the others received their cards? I’m not doing this for recognition, but I did expect some type of acknowledgement that they received it…

The one person I heard from left me a voicemail saying that it made her “weepy” and was “exactly what I needed in a time when I needed it the most” – to hear that made my heart feel full and as soon as I received that voicemail I sat down and wrote two more cards. It was such a satisfying feeling knowing I brought joy to someone in their time of need.”

It is funny – I am seeing a pattern in us with this project.  When I sent out cards before this project started and didn’t hear back from someone I also wondered if they actually received my card.  There is a part of us that wants that love returned to us so badly, or at least acknowledgement that we sent our love.  Then little changes start to happen in our hearts and we become ok that we don’t hear back from people, but when we do – it is pure joy – it makes our hearts sing to know we really helped someone feel love just from a simple note we wrote them.
It is crazy how sending your love, expressing yourself with the knowing that you might not get the love back will change you at your core and all for the better.  It is kind of like doing an act of kindness in secret – they don’t have a chance to say thank you right then and there – doing thing like this will grow your heart with more love and kindness...and what the world needs now is love, sweet love.

Sunday, June 12, 2011

Learning to give out love...

“The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love, and let it come in.” ~Morrie Schwartz
Learning to give out love is has been one of the hardest lessons in my life…it seems SO easy but yet it is scary to give out love – what if who you are giving your love to doesn’t give it back or worse, what if they don’t want your love?
It has taken me 33 years to learn this, but getting love back isn’t the point of giving out your love.  The point of giving out your love isn’t to have people tell you thank you, or to have them give it back – when they do that is icing on the cake.  But the point of giving out your love has to be a selfless act.  You can’t expect them to return – you can only give it with an open and loving heart.
That is a big reason I created these postcards.  For me, writing down my love is MUCH easier than telling people in person.  I have time to gather my thoughts, feelings, emotions, etc and write them down verses trying to tell them in person and stumbling all over my words then leave feeling like a complete failure for messing up what I just tried to say to them…yes, I am still learning to give selfless love and acceptance to myself as well – that one might take me another few years. J
So try it, try to send out selfless love to people in your life without expecting anything back for them – it is my hope that all of us doing this will change us - will make it easier to love more openly to all people in our lives – even those we don’t actually know but just encounter.
“The honorary duty of a human being is to love” ~ Maya Angelou

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Here is another email I received from one of the participants doing this project with me.

Sending Love – Day 1.
When Renee came out with this idea, I jumped at the chance to participate. I’m always looking for ways to stay in touch with my friends and family, and always feel like I never tell people how much I appreciate them and what they do for me. The words “I love you” have always been difficult for me to say to anyone but my husband, and even just starting the project has really helped me understand why.
Day 1 was by far the hardest day for me. I didn’t go into the project with any kind of plan, other than to send them out to people as I thought of them. The first people coming to mind? My parents. Of course, I love them, so why was this so hard?
Day 1 was so hard for me, I had the postcard sitting on my desk for a full day before I actually wrote it. It took me a really long time just to figure out how to send three simple words to the two people who have been there from the very beginning. Why? Well, because we just don’t say those words to each other! I think I’ve seen or heard my parents say the words “I love you” a total of four times in my entire life. When I graduated high school (in a card), when I graduated college (in a card), the first time I got married (in a speech), and once after I got divorced (on the phone! Directly!), I heard it. I mean, its assumed, and I know it.. but that doesn’t change that its really hard to say. We don’t really hug each other or show affection either, and when it comes down to it – I get frustrated with my parents very easily. My husband is convinced that it has to do with me never hearing those three little words from them, though I think it’s more about growing up in an overly strict household that I felt really stifled in. It really took a lot of effort for me to write it out to them, even though I know in my heart that I do love them. Well, my husband is probably right, and it’s also why I’m so darn awkward in situations where friends get all lovey on me. I’m just not used to it.
I considered not sending the “I love you” card and sending the “Good Deeds” card.. but decided that it would be a cop out. I can’t cop out on Day 1! That would be failure! So I tried to just mention the elephant in the room and keep it simply by saying, “Dear Mom and Dad, I know I don’t say it often, but I love you. Thank you for being there for me through all of the ups and downs, and through all of my mistakes and triumphs.”
I decided a long time ago that the only thing I could do to fix it is to not be the same way with my children. With that in mind, it felt strange sending it off in the mail. I kind of await an awkward phone call from my mom about it.. but who knows, maybe she’ll surprise me.

I love her honesty – this isn’t easy to do this.  People might think we are weird for telling them out of the blue that we love them, or they are important to us – to the world, or thank you for them being them. 
I have slowly started getting over caring if people think I am weird for doing something my heart tells me to do.  I sometimes catch myself not doing something because of this, then I take a deep breath and do it anyway – weird or not!

Monday, June 6, 2011

First Week thoughts -

From Michele:
 
"I am so excited about being a part of your project! I think it is so important to show the people we love that we love them and how much they mean to us. I made my list of people to send my post cards to the other day and have 34. The first several days have been easy but I think after a few more it will get more difficult. Not because I love some of the people on my list any less but because I don't really know how to express to them how I feel or don't want them to think I am "weird" for sending them a random note. I really tried to not only think of the people that I talk to on a regular basis but also those that I don't talk to much or those that I thought might need a little note of love. So far I have written a note every night. It has been good for me to sit down and have some quiet time and think about all the people in my life that I love. The other night was quite emotional for me when I sat down to write a postcard to my mom. It made me start thinking about how much love and appreciation I have toward both my parents. Then the question came up..."Can you send a postcard to Heaven?"...of course not but I sure wish you could. I don't think I truly told my dad how much I loved him and how much I appreciated everything he did for me and now I can't tell him. One reason is that I don't think I fully appreciated my parents until I became a parent myself. We need to tell everyone in our lives especially those closest to us how much we love them, appreciate them, admire them, etc frequently because you never know what the next day will bring. That is why I think this project is SO important and awesome!
Thanks for inviting me to be a part of this with you! I love you...you are an inspiration to so many!"
 
This really hit the spot for me.  I do wonder if what I am doing is helping anyone, is important, will ever get the word out there that it is so important to live from our hearts and this helps me know it is working and will continue to work.  I need to know that I need to continue to put myself out there too if I am expecting everyone else to do it as well.

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Its the small things....

Someone asked me how they were supposed to a send a postcard that reads “Remember there’s no such thing as small act of kindness.  Every act creates a ripple with no logical end” as a sending love card.

Don’t think of this as a “thank-you card” for a birthday gift or a material gift. 
These are the gifts we need to thank each other for that are much beyond material goods – these are the gifts that people have and use that make this world a better place.
Some examples could be: thank you for sharing your time to help me/the church/the school/children, etc.
Thank you for your art – it brightens my day every time I look at it. 
Thank you for your kindness – it touches the lives of many. 
Thank you for listening to and following your heart – the world is a better place with you in it doing what you are doing.
Thank you for being a great nurse/doctor/barista – any job that helps you in any way – remember it is usually the small “helps” that make a HUGE difference in our lives. And it is those small helps that usually go unnoticed.
Do you see the difference?  We don’t tell people thank you for the little things – for the things we expect them to do/be, etc.  But those are things we need to say thank you for, those are the things that make this world go around, those are the things that show love – and love is what we need to show.
If you have more ideas on who to write thank-you postcards to and for what, let us know.  I love hearing new ideas.  Oh and for your help, I will draw a name from all the comments for a 10 pack of postcards (your choice) on Tuesday morning – so think away!

Thursday, June 2, 2011

Day 1 - From Sara

Sara sent me this email about Day 1 – I love it, her honesty about being nervous but excited it wonderfully true.

“Last night I sat down and was so excited to see the beautiful postcards you sent, how exciting! Then I looked around our study and noticed all the nice cards I had piled up – waiting for someone special to send them to – Why hadn’t I sent cards out in the past?
I made my list…wow, only 22 and a few have question marks next to their name; why? One person I immediately thought of sending to, I don’t have their address anymore, it’s going to take a little work! As for the names with question marks, is it that I don’t love them? No. But I don’t really know them anymore, our lives have grown apart over the years. Funny enough, a few family members (distant) passed through my head, the older members sounded like good ideas…but again, the younger members made me nervous – why do I care so much if they think I’m weird because I love them? Interesting process already…
I’m feeling a little uneasy sending my love. Seems so personal, what if they think I’m a dork? Can I send my “like”? Would I think they were odd if it was reversed? No. Time to get over my apprehension! Who doesn’t appreciate a little love and some “real” mail these days?!
First card going out tonight.
I actually had a passing thought that I might write a few cards to myself, for self-love, appreciation and reflection. What would I say to myself?”

I love the thought of sending one to yourself! We need to love ourselves too.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

Words...

I recieve these emails everyday from Daily Word - they are spiritualy basedl can be applied to all - kind of little lessons to think about and/or do daily.  Today's is very apropos:

Words
I speak words of peace, inspiration and hope.
The words I speak or write contain immense creative power. When I confidently state my goals or intentions, I set in motion ideas that have the power to manifest in my life. At the same time, sharing uplifting words has a positive impact on others. Words of kindness and caring create a healing and nurturing environment.
Because the words I use have such power, I choose them carefully, taking time in prayer before speaking or writing them. My words create peace where there was discord, inspiration where there was apathy, and hope where there was despair. Guided by Spirit, I share words that bless and uplift.
So shall my word be that goes out from my mouth; it shall not return to me empty, but it shall accomplish that which I purpose. --Isaiah 55:11